{Sunsets} And Being Present When it Matters

I flew to Seattle unexpectedly on Wednesday morning because I caught news that my older brother was in the hospital with pneumonia. This is the second time he has been hospitalized in the last five months for the same thing. Everyone assured me that he was okay or that he would be okay. But here's the thing...I am 1200 miles from him and feel so helpless from that far away. This is the challenging part about living far from family. It had been too long since I saw him last and I was worried for my BIG brother. So within 12 hours of learning of this, I was on a plane. He has had an unbelievably difficult year and I needed to know that he was okay in more ways than one.

The moment I walked into his hospital room, he began to cry (I guess no one told him I was coming?). But it just confirmed to me that I made the right decision. And just maybe my big brother needed his little sister to love on him too?

This trip has me thinking of much. This trip meant that I was missing a family wedding and a dear friend's baby shower. It meant that I was spending money that I probably should not be otherwise. It meant that I would be away from my daughter longer than ever and have to arrange for care for her. But there is something I'm learning from living this last 36 years, there are no do-overs....and this life is precious. And in moments such as these, I do not want regrets. I want to be present when in matters most. And when it comes to family...it matters most.

(All images captured with my iPhone)

Me, my sister Lynnette, and brother Brian.

The view from the top floor of the hospital where my brother was staying.

While driving from the hospital in Seattle to my parents home in Olympia on day one of me arriving, the sunset & sky was probably the most magical sky I have ever seen. And it only got better as we neared my parent's home. I was awe struck the entire drive by the sun setting and the clouds floating on the blue sky.

I was so completely mesmerized. I told my sister that..."I think God is speaking to us."
She replied, "and what is he saying?"
"That everything is going to be okay."
And it is. And even if it wasn't....I felt so much peace in that moment.

While I was visiting my brother in the hospital I took a walk on Broadway while he was dozing. I bought a card for him at the coolest art store ever. I loved the words. They spoke to me. And I hoped they would speak to him as well.

Happiness (Alfred D. Souza)


For a long time it seemed to me that life was about to begin - real life. But there was always some obstacle in the way, something to be gotten through first, some unfinished business, time to still be served, a debt to be paid. Then life would begin. At last it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life. This perspective has helped me to see that there is no way to happiness. Happiness is the way. So, treasure every moment that you have. And treasure it more because you shared it with someone special, special enough to spend your time … and remember that time waits for no one…

------ (after 'googling' the quote, I found the rest below...)

So stop waiting
until you finish school,
until you go back to school,
until you lose ten pounds,
until you gain ten pounds,
until you have kids,
until your kids leave the house,
until you start work,
until you retire,
until you get married,
until you get divorced,
until Friday night,
until Sunday morning,
until you get a new car or home,
until your car or home is paid off,
until spring,
until summer,
until fall,
until winter,
until you are off welfare,
until the first or fifteenth,
until your song comes on,
until you've had a drink,
until you've sobered up,
until you die,
until you are born again
to decide that there is no better time than right now to be happy…
Happiness is a journey, not a destination.

By the time we arrived to my parents home in Olympia, the sky had turned pink. It was stunning!

In the midst of worry and pain, this sunset reminded me of much. Reminded me of the beauty that always surrounds us. The beauty in challenging situations that bring family and friends close together. And the reminder to always keep life in perspective, remembering what matters, and always being present when it matters most.